Unlimited Bread

This is the final week of the Holiday Challenge at Peak313 and I have really enjoyed making sacrifices for healthier choices so that I may share resources with others.  They ranged from leaving my warm bed in the wee hours for a workout to passing on high calorie food and drink at a holiday get together.  I have made promises to donate warm blankets to the needy as well as money toward Heartspring, an organization that has The Care Program for high functioning autistic children that my son participates in. They have reached him  and I hope that my contribution will allow them to reach many more.

To my surprise I have also LOST 2 pounds since Thanksgiving! I think this challenge was timely for me to stay on track and not be one of the average Americans who gains 8-12 pounds during the holiday season.  I have stepped up my training, turning holiday stress into spinning fuel.  I have come to prefer the bike and resistance bands to the treadmill or elliptical these days, which is great because I get exercise boredom easily.  I have also made some changes to my diet that are really paying off, including limiting my intake of bread.  I am a HUGE bread lover. When you hear of prisoners having only bread and water, I am the girl that thinks that wouldn't be too bad, which makes makes me smile that this week's challenge verse is  “Then Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.” John 6:35

I have to remember that I am not giving up ALL bread.  In fact, with God at the forefront of my physical, emotional and spiritual health, I get unlimited bread.  Clare at Peak313 challenged us this week to share when we realized that Jesus was the bread of life. I believe I have always known that since I accepted him in my heart at age 10, but I don't think I truly realized  that it is He who sustains me until many years later.  After leaving a bad marriage and dealing with yo yo weight gains and losses, about 3 years ago I realized that the food for my soul isn't found in what I put in my mouth during bad or good times or what others say to or about me.  It isn't found in my appearance or if I feel fat or not.  My soul food doesn't come from earthly possessions or what I have or have not accomplished.  My bread comes from God and he feeds me not only spiritually but emotionally and physically also. When all three of those are fed through Him, it is an amazing feeling.    

“There will never be another woman who owns the look, the personality, and the experience that you do. Those ingredients make up the recipe that defines who you are, and it's your gift from the Lord - own it.” 
― Candace Cameron Bure, Reshaping It All: Motivation for Physical and Spiritual Fitness 


God gave me my body, God gave me my soul, He drives everything that happens to me and He will sustain me.   It is my duty to Him to keep partaking in his bread to fulfill all of my needs.  Although I love bread, oh especially those yummy holiday breads, God provides me with unlimited bread.  The good news is it's less in calories and sticks with me much longer than the carbs of other breads.  Have a great day! 

Let's Be Users

I was reading one of my favorite blogs by Bonnie Pfiester  http://pfitblog.com/2012/11/30/handicapped-by-fat-why-laziness-kills/ today and I thought it was a great message.  She wrote how America seems to be paralyzed by laziness, or as she put it:  Handicapped by Fat.  She mentioned about the use of scooters by people that can but refuse to walk, please realize she was in no way attacking those who are truly paralyzed.  The point I took away from the blog was, unless we stay healthy and active, we will end up not enjoying our lives to the fullest.

So why is it that we do not use our bodies?  Bonnie pointed out impatience, which I get that. I think of all the places I could walk to and I don't simply because I want to get there faster.  Heck, MY GYM is less than 2 miles from my house so I could walk there.  Perhaps at 3:30 am it is not the safest idea, but you get the point.   Not too long ago I loaned my Reshaping It All book to a neighbor who lives about 8 or so blocks from me. It was a windy night, but otherwise decent weather.  As I was picking up my keys I thought 'what are you doing?' I was seriously going to DRIVE to her house to deliver a book about getting healthy. I walked and was glad I did.

Another point of the article is that sometimes things get hard and it leads to laziness.This could be an injury, a little more weight, life's perils, heart issues, etc. that lead a person to stop exercising or even remaining mobile  for that matter. I think about all the times things got hard for me and all the times I quit.  I remember losing all the weight after my son was born 12 years ago and was a total gym rat.  Then I slowly started to let life creep in and wasn't working out as much, which led to weight gain and my highest weight ever in 2004. Next thing I knew, I was giving up.  I wasn't using my body for much of anything other than eating and taking care of my family, which was suffering because I was lazy and depressed.

Like Bonnie, my point is not to chastise the people who utilize scooters.  All I am saying is that we need to USE our bodies so we don't LOSE them.  It's no secret B is older than I am nor is it a secret that he is in very good physical health.  I know we both work hard to play hard.   I want to reach as many goals as we can together be that keeping in shape, traveling, enjoying the outdoors, just living life to the fullest and so on. I'm in for using my body to it's fullest potential and even pushing it beyond to boost my quality of life, plus I think it just sounds sort of funny to say 'I'm a user' and it actually mean a good thing.  HAPPY FRIDAY!

Small Sacrifice, Big Reward -Holiday Challenge Week 1

As I posted previously, I am participating in the Peak313 Holiday Challenge.  Simply put it's a challenge that allows me to share something with others when I make a sacrifice.  It's geared toward giving up unhealthy habits over the holiday and replacing them with healthy ones.  This morning I didn't not want to leave my bed for the gym, but forced myself to give up my nice warm cozy spot to go do something healthy.  In return I am donating blankets so that others can have a warm bed. It just made me feel good knowing that when I gave something up I wasn't rewarding myself with an extra Diet Pepsi or maybe more sleep tomorrow morning, but instead giving something to others-actually rewarding myself greatly in the process. 

Was it a huge sacrifice to get up and go to the gym this morning?  No it wasn't since I am accustom to going to the gym often. However, I haven't been on a Monday in awhile and it was really cold, so I say small sacrifice.  :-) Will it be a huge burden  for me to donate blankets? My God always makes the ends at my house meet, so helping others is something that I am glad to do.  Will my sacrifices in the next 21 days be small or large?  Only time can tell, but I do want to challenge myself to really put myself out on a limb to help others this holiday season through donations of time, money and goods.  

As Clare wrote in her blog, God gave us the ultimate sacrifice so any sacrifice of mine is the least I can do.  Let us not forget “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

So who is going to join me?  Get your jar, start jotting it down when you make a sacrifice and decide what you will share with others.  Leftover pie in the fridge?  How about just half a piece and donating some canned items to the food bank?  Holidays give you the blues?  Try turning off the sad Christmas movie (yes there are some really sad ones) and take a walk instead, your reward could be some cash or time to your favorite charity.  

It's not too late, the deal is below and I can't wait to see your results! 

http://peak313.com/featured/21-days-to-a-hunger-free-and-healthy-holiday-week-1-sacrifice/

Holidays are Challenging-Challenge Accepted!

Holidays are stressful and challenging. Sometimes I admit I find myself getting worked up as the Christmas countdown begins. As many of you know I did a 5 Week Challenge at Peak313 and really learned a lot about myself and the relationship between my spiritual and physical fitness. Thanks to Clare at Peak313, I am going to be part of another challenging Christmas-this time in a good way.  Please take a minute to see the challenge below and I pray that you consider joining me.  Let's challenge ourselves this year!

http://peak313.com/featured/holiday-challenge-21-days-to-a-hunger-free-and-healthy-holiday/

I cannot wait to get started fighting off the cravings and collecting money for a good cause while  I am at it!

Zombies Hate Fast Food

It seems you can't go anywhere these days without hearing about evil Zombies and their plot to eat us all alive.  At Halloween it's even more prevalent.  I had to giggle when I came across this image on a fitness blog  this weekend.

A humorous take on yet another good reason for us to strive for better health.  It made me think, how many more reasons do I, or anyone else for that matter, need to improve our health?  I know my list is long-I want to please God by respecting the body he gave me, the bad genes that put me at risk for heart disease and diabetes, my self respect, active kids that need an active mom, keeping up with a fiance that is in great physical shape and simply just to live the most fulfilling life I can.  In essence, it is much like the silly picture above-I am exercising and controlling what I eat because I am running for my life.  

If a Zombie were really chasing us so they could munch on our brains, wouldn't we do whatever we could to outrun them? Shouldn't we want to do whatever we can to lessen the risk of health complications and thus live a better life?  So what holds us back?  Just  a little something to think about today on this wonderful Monday!

Little Fighter

If I have said it once, I have said it a thousand times-I love it when things just seem to come together!  This morning I received Bonnie’s email from Pfit where she referenced her husband Steve’s blog which had a great message. I have been feeling a little sluggish in many areas of my life and it seems like my oomph, my ‘fight’ is just not what it used to be. The Pfit message really turned the light on in my head, thank you God  for leading me to it:

If you aren’t willing to fight for what you want, you deserve what you get. 

This message is simple, profound, timely and useful in many areas of my life at the moment.  I feel that I have been in the fight for what seems like most of my life and there are days I want to give up.  I have to remember that God gave me a fighting Irish spirit for a reason-because He knew I would need it and he knew I would USE it. 

I work in a male-dominated occupation where I often sit at a negotiation table with people who have been working longer than I have been alive and some who like to underestimate me.  Some of my cohorts call me the Little Fighter because when I know my position is correct, I don't back down. Since I am in the fight so much at work, it is hard to do so in my personal life. I must stay in the fight for better health, to set a foundation for my upcoming marriage, in order to gain a more comfortable financial position, to ensure success for myself and my family in all areas of life, etc.….my fight list is long.  If I opt to not fight for those things which are most important, than I truly do deserve what I get. 

The sluggard craves and gets nothing, but the desires of the diligent are fully satisfied.  Proverbs 13:4 (NIV)  

Even when I grow weary I have to remember that keeping a fighting spirit will bring me satisfaction and accomplishment.   I pray God gives me the strength to stay diligently in the fight for all that is necessary and important.  

Keeping the Faith

B and I have started taking 10 mile hikes every other weekend.  While we frequent the gym and are both in great physical shape, the 10 mile hike can be a test.  Let me first start off by saying since we live in the Great Plans, it's not much of a hike in the sense of any elevation change.  The terrain, as an old railroad track, is flat, somewhat uneven in spots with great views of farms and wildlife. It takes us from one small town to the next and back again. Yesterday's trek was rough on us both.  I am unsure why but could be because we have both been working out extra hard at the gym since we challenged one another to get back to our goal weights. I also think we were just simply worn out from a stressful week at work and just life in general.  There was more than one instance when we both said we didn't know if we could make it to the end-but we did.

What if B and I had just stopped on our hike?  One of us would have had to go get the car, breaking up our 'team'. If it were him going to get the car and me being left behind, I would have been fearful of just plain surviving-coyotes and strangers frequent this trail. We are stronger as a team and finishing together is the goal.

 In life, what if we decided to run our own race without God or the support of others?  Our likelihood of survival and ultimate salvation are not as great. In the picture below it shows me on the trail alone, but as in life, looks can be deceiving.  B is right behind me, ready to catch up after he took the shot and God is by my side. It is my journey, but I am not alone.

At the ultimate finish line, I want to be able to say what 2 Timothy 4:7 says, I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.  Keep the faith, friends!

Free Prevention

I have been doing a lot of research, okay really a lot of Pinterest, Facebook, and blog reading about fitness.  I love how I feel when I am healthy-exercising regularly and eating right.  Seems I can't get enough on the subject lately and who can resist all those catchy fitness quotes and motivational pictures on Pinterest?

This morning I read an article stating that the highest growing population of obese people are the severely obese.  Made me super sad for these folks, what if they would have found the tools when the weight gain began to be successful at a healthier lifestyle?  Could they have stopped their cycle and ended up leading productive lifestyles rather than settle for one that is hindered by poor health?  Obesity is one of the largest growing causes of death, I pray that more people can find the tools to help prevent it.

I could go on and on about all the negative crap.  However, it's Friday and I am going to stay in the positive.  So, here's the positive-although obesity claims the lives of many people every day it can be prevented.  Even better-prevention is practically FREE.  All that reading I have been doing is FREE.  Recipes on Pinterest, workouts shared by friends, online news articles, blogs....all FREE. I just finished the Peak313 Challenge and it was totally FREE.  Clare posted everything on her website for us to use in our journeys.  Although I do belong to a gym, workouts can be done anywhere! Some of my best workouts have been while enjoying the beauty of God's earth.  Of course there is the factor of purchasing shoes or equipment or those cute little outfits when you lose the pounds after working hard, but isn't that worth the price if it extends your life?

Just a small thought for this Friday and here is a little recap of the challenge I just completed.  It's a FREE guide/reminder/motivation.

Peak313 Challenge-I'm going to miss you!!!

Wow, the last week of my Peak313 Challenge and 21/2 weeks left on my challenge with B.  I had lost a pound the week before I started Peak313 on my other challenge. I have lost 4 pounds on the Peak313 challenge, bringing my total to 5 pounds in 6 weeks.  Only 7 more to go to hit my goal weight.  I have gained much more than I have lost though, the Peak313 Challenge has been a true God-send.  Here are my results:

Week One-I didn't lose any weight, but I definitely saw changes in my lifestyle. I worked out 6 days a week and did a really good job counting my calories. I went back to giving everything to God, realizing my spiritual, emotional and physical health must all be in concert.  This time around I only had 12 to lose and I reminded myself I once lost 3.5 times that.

Week Two-LOST THREE POUNDS!!!!  Made me 33% of my goal.  I followed the challenge for the week to give my worries to God and remember that each day had it's own worry.  Rather than worrying for tomorrow, I started planning for tomorrow.  Packing my lunches and preparing healthy meals ahead of time really paid off.  I also managed to find time for longer workouts because I planned ahead of time.

Week Three-Again no weight loss but it was a great week recognizing my cravings and how to ask God for help.  I figured out my food and non-food cravings were related, which was sort of humorous and interesting at the same time.  The one thing I did realize was that writing about my food cravings really didn't make me crave them more, which was the opposite of what I figured would happen.

Week Four-Lost one pound and worked on making my heart healthy. Enjoyed a wonderful extra 10 mile hike on top of my regular exercise.  Keeping bad food, people, thoughts and influences out of my heart makes it an all around healthy organ.  There goes that spiritual, emotional and physical connection again-don't you just love it?

Week Five-Last week of the challenge made me sad.  I loved reading others blogs and progress, not to mention getting the weekly Soul Food verses to keep me going.  I didn't end up losing any weight this week but again, I feel better and my workouts are getting stronger and longer.  The challenge reminded me that this is not a sprint, but a marathon and one that lasts an earthly lifetime.  Some races will be won, others will be lost.  I must keep in mind that my spiritual, physical and emotional health are what God wants for me as his child.  The ultimate finish line is not a number on a scale or a smaller size of jeans, it's eternity.

I hope everyone enjoyed the challenge and I am going to miss it so bad!!!  Okay, Clare....give us another one, please?

Non-Traditional Bullying

We all hear a lot about double standards, but one has come to light a lot in my life recently that I feel is worth  mentioning.  I understand I may receive some criticism or people will not be fond of this post, but this is my blog that contains my thoughts, opinions, values and so on.

The double standard I am talking about is a form of bullying. Attacking one's physical appearance.  No I am not talking about making fun of someones hair or unattractive nose.  I am speaking about those who attack others about their weight and physical health.  You can't pick up a news article or peruse Facebook without seeing a story about how a bully called another person fat or lazy.  But how often do we hear about people being bullied for being in good physical health and therefore slender, athletic or muscular in stature?

I can all ready hear those who disagree with me....what is she saying?  No one makes fun of skinny people, everyone picks on people who are overweight.   It is my stance that bullying that is not traditionally recognized in the media is just as prevalent as the more publicized bullying is.  Let me just give you an example of a few things that I have heard aimed toward me in the last few months:

• Don't you ever eat?  The truth is I love to eat, to plan meals and enjoy treats.  I also watch my calories as to not overdue it (I have been overweight before).  I am also not underweight.  I do not have an eating disorder and I do not starve myself.  Doesn't sound like bullying to you?  Then tell me this-is it any different than someone saying to an overweight person you must eat a lot?  

• You spend so much time in the gym that you probably never see your family. Actually, I typically try to work out while my family is still sleeping or otherwise engaged.  It is not the business of anyone how I run my life, but when you assume I don't spend time with my family it really stings because family time is my most cherished possession.  Sounds like more mean statements to me.

• Your fiance must really push you to be skinny and that's too bad, he should love you the way you are.  I hear this so much and I realize it's because I post on Facebook frequently about how B and I get our cardio time in together. We also challenged one another to get back to our goal weights, which I have also been public about.  Since I make it public, these crude comments should not really bother me but they do a little.  B loves me the way I am, but he also understands the value of good health and that I am not happy when I have let my weight get out of control.  The way he cooks healthy meals and suggests a walk over dessert actually shows me how much he does love me.  

 Bullying takes on several forms and it can be aimed at anyone. It hurts just as bad even if it is not what is considered to be 'traditional' bullying.  I just wish more people would recognize that.  

Happy Saturday!

I'm Moving

After Week 4 of the Peak313 Challenge and Week 5 of my challenge with B, it looks like I managed to lose a pound last week, bringing my loss to 5 pounds.  I still can’t get over how good I feel, despite what the scale may say and I need to remember I am almost half way to my 12 pound weight loss goal.

The Soul Food for last week was Proverbs 4:23, which reminds us how our hearts should be guarded.  I had a great week meditating on the verse and contemplating guarding my heart, but not closing it.  Letting good things in while keeping bad things out is metaphorical: think fatty high cholesterol foods/nasty mean spirited people or physical exercise/spiritual exercise.  I like the thought of my heart being the center of it ALL-my spiritual, emotional and physical well beings all depend on my heart. 

The Soul Food for Week 5 (the final week L) of the Peak313 Challenge just seems to emphasize where I am in my life: 

May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through.  May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.                               1 Thessalonians 5:23.

 The challenge for this week is to remind ourselves that nothing is a sprint, it’s a marathon and one that we will be on forever.  Quitting is not an option and we must ask God for strength when times get rough.

Hey, that sounds like my spiritual, emotional and physical well beings that I keep referring to. It also speaks to my slow but sure journey I am on with physical fitness, single parenting, preparation for re-marriage, and most of all-my relationship with God.  Thanks Peak313, this is timely-I love it when a plan comes together! J

I saw this quote on the Facebook of someone who is on a quest for better physical fitness:

Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.~Will Rogers.

So true!  I can easily say I’m participating in this or that challenge or heading in the right direction, but can I easily say that I am MOVING?  It doesn’t matter how fast I move, as long as I do.  The marathon is ahead of me but there several races that will be won or lost along the way.  I pray for the strength to run  each race with the ultimate finish line in mind-salvation. 

Happy Monday and enjoy your marathon!

From Hurtful to Heart-full

The Soul Food for Week 4 of the Peak313 Challenge is Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Proverbs 4:23 The challenge is to confront hurtful things of the past, realize how we react to hurtful situations currently and for the future, figure out what can be done to put some worries and hurt to rest.  Tall order, but I am up for it.

I guard my heart, maybe too much because it has been hurt, broken and beaten time and time again.  It's hard to let someone in after you go through so much.  Fortunately after many years of praying, I am able to let others in easier.  It is still somewhat of a challenge and something I will probably always wrestle with.  Sometimes I giggle at some of the silly things I did early in my relationship with B so I could keep him at arms length and my heart guarded.  My strong man persevered and would not be detoured by my silliness.  What a lucky girl I am.  I keep a close watch on this heart of mine....for you I'd walk the line-no wonder it's 'our song.'

I believe a lot of us have many hurtful comments from the past that creep up. From mean girl comments, to things said by old boyfriends and even nasty words from family members.  I won't even get started on the mess from my failed marriage.   I could go on and on all day about all that crud. But is that really the point of this challenge? Not for this girl, I want to stay in the positive.  I am going to focus on the now and the future.

As far as how I react to hurtful situations now, let me start with the most extreme. It took me a long time but something I heard in a sermon one day really clicked with me-Forgiving someone for hurting you does not mean you have to let them be in your life.  Too many times society sends a different message.  We are taught that forgiveness is allowing people in your life that have hurt, currently hurt and will most likely hurt you again.  I can forgive someone while guarding my heart.  I don't have to spend holidays with the relative that was abusive, I don't have to socialize with catty women who make mean girl comments (still,at this age?) and I can end the conversation when my wasband starts pushing my buttons.  My forgiveness is in my heart, something I ask God for, and not something I have to prove by letting hurtful people around.

For non-extreme hurtful moments, I try to start with prayer and ask God to help me understand why someone hurt me or realize if I was part of the equation.  I also try to not close my heart, which I have to remember is different than guarding it.  There are also times that I realize it's really not worth getting worked up over, too many other things to worry about.  Now, THAT is one peaceful feeling.

The journey from hurtful to heart-full is an interesting and sometimes scary path. I hope to continue to give my worries to God, for him to guide me through any hurtful situation and to help me forgive those who have hurt me.  It is also MY choice how I let others treat me, how I react to it and how it affects my heart. I choose a healthy heart.

Balancing the Brownies

Week 3 of my Peak313 Challenge and Week 4 of my challenge with B have ended.  I had a great week of healthy eating and awesome workouts.  I really pushed myself to battle the cravings that were the center of the Peak313 goals.  I also resolved not to be so focused on the scale, although I do feel a tad disappointed that I ended up staying the same weight and not losing this week.  My clothes fit better and I FEEL better, so that's my measure of success this time around.

I found some interesting connections between my top 3 food and non-food cravings while spending time meditating and memorizing the Peak313 Soul Food for Week 3, 1 John 2:16.  My three blogs on Cheese Fries/Family Time, Cheesecake/Financial Stability and Chinese/An Organized Lifestyle really helped me figure out each craving and how to keep them in balance and check.  Plans to maintain moderation and resolving to keep everything balanced now fill my head and notebook.  Now only to balance my lifestyle and  find time to organize those plans.  :-)

I had the ultimate challenge Saturday night for anyone trying to maintain or lose weight, THE COOKOUT.  A girlfriend of mine recently bought a house and I knew there was going to be all sorts of yummy treats filling the tables.  I was prepared, prayed for strength, resolved to keep my cravings in check and eat only the things I really wanted and to keep those portions small.  Armed with my healthy appetizer, I headed to the party.  I was happy to see lots of people there to talk to, that helps me from pigging out.  However.....the only seat left was right next to the food and right next to the cutest sweetest little girl who I will call K.

K is the daughter of a friend of mine, she was fresh from getting a new pixie haircut and was thrilled she helped her mom bake triple chocolate brownies.  Oh no, I could feel it coming on....the puppy dog eyes stared me down and asked me if I was going to try one of her brownies.  Brownies had not been on my list of things I would eat that evening, but how could I say no?  I ate a small one and raved about how wonderful it was.  Little K was thrilled and her smile made my night.

Cravings, both food and non-food, aren't always bad as long as they are taken in small bites and only occupy a small spot on our plates. This week God helped me recognize and start to battle my cravings with moderation and balance, while reminding me I am human. A few years ago that brownie would have turned into two and I would have never thought about praying for help.  Finding that connection between spiritual health and physical health is the best weight loss 'secret' anyone could uncover.

Hope all the Peak313 ladies had a great week, let's make this one even BETTER!

Craving Connection Part 3

This week my Peak313 Challenge is about cravings.  The Soul Food is 1 John 2:16, which speaks to cravings and how they are sinful and of the world. I have been blogging about the correlations I have realized between my food cravings and my non-food cravings.  Hey, it's an interesting way to tackle some of the things that trouble me.   I have taken on Cheese Fries and Family Time, Cheesecake and Financial Stability and today for my final post on this subject I am tackling Chinese Food and An Organized Lifestyle.  Just thinking about them makes me want to sort mail while eating some crab rangoons.....

Food Craving #3-Chinese Food, mainly the take-out kind.  Fried rice, crab rangoons, almond chicken, lo mein, broccoli beef-I'm not picky with this craving. While not a fan of the cheap buffet version, I can definitely devour massive quantities if I am in the right, ahem, I mean WRONG mind set.  

Non-Food Craving #2-An Organized Lifestyle.  I know, another silly sounding craving right?  Anyone that knows me knows that I enjoy things to be orderly and organized.  Many criticize this craving of mine, but as long as I keep it in check, I think it does a lot of good. 

Chinese food, what is the allure?  Besides the salty fix it gives me, it is typically presented in a very nice orderly manner.  Already seeing that correlation?  When you get the Chinese food, it is typically packed in little quaint boxes or in a compartmentalized box with a few entrees separated nicely.  Aside from organization, Chinese food brings repetition-most take out menus are basically the same and I always know what the dish will typically taste like.  Did I mention it is also GOOOOODDDD?  I am fantasizing here as I eat my avocado, black bean and spinach salad for lunch.  :-)

It wasn't difficult to find the relationship between my Chinese food craving and my craving to have an organized lifestyle.  I love to have things planned, organized and executed well.  My family benefits because we all know where things are, when something is going to happen and we don't waste our time searching through clutter for necessities.  Like I mentioned before, MANY people tell me I'm too organized or am wasting my life cleaning and getting my ducks in a row.  It took me a long time to not be hurt by them, but now I realize God helps me keep balance. I often do these tasks while the kids are still asleep or we do them together.  Everyday I make sure that my time de-cluttering or cleaning or planning never interrupts special time with my family.  We even ENJOY making the monthly calendar together.  

Several times I ask God to help me not be quick to anger when someone attacks how I live.  As I stated, I truly believe I am not wasting time and it actually saves my family time and money that we can put toward meaningful things rather than replacing something that was lost, paying a late fee, showing up late, etc.  Children thrive in an organized environment where tasks are completed on time and there is stability.  Organization and repetition go hand in hand (like I mentioned about my yummy Chinese food above) and I thank God that he has helped me provide that for my family. 

So the next time I find myself becoming too immersed in organizing my life or the next time I want to eat pounds of lo mein, I must remember  1 Corinthians 8:9 (NIV) Be careful, however, that the exercise of your rights does not become a stumbling block to the weak. 

Although I was first apprehensive, it has been great week  identifying my cravings and using scripture to help me keep them in check. Hoping all my Peak313 friends found it useful. 

Craving Connection Part 2

This week my Peak313 Challenge is about cravings.  The Soul Food is 1 John 2:16, which speaks to cravings and how they are sinful and of the world. I have found relationships between my food cravings and my non-food cravings.  Seems a little funny to me, but also makes a lot of sense.  Yesterday I tackled my craving for Cheese Fries and Family Time.  Today in Part 2 of 3 I take on Cheesecake and Financial Stability.  Before you laugh, to me there IS a connection between the two!

Food Craving #2-Cheesecake.  Enough said.

Non-Food Craving #2-Financial Stability.   I crave it so bad I feel defeated when an extra bill comes up or I don't get the raise I wanted. I also find myself envious of those who appear more stable than me.  I know that God wants us to be good stewards of our money and when I start feeling less stable, I feel like I have failed. 

I was a teenager when I had Lo and many times I wasn't sure if I could pay my bills. I was terrified she was going to grow up like I had, with parents that had no desire to gain or maintain financial stability.  I used that thought to drive me through college and graduate school while working full time.  I also married my wasband because I craved financial stability so deeply, only to find myself a single mother again seven years later.  Fortunately, although not always easy, I maintain a household where I pay the bills, where my children learn how to be responsible with money and there is a future for them. Of course that doesn’t mean I don’t worry about money, I do.  I pray that God helps me with that worry and reminds me of my blessings.

Does cheesecake equate to financial stability?  YES!  To me growing up, special things like cheesecake equaled extra money. I remember going to eat one time with a wealthy friend of mine.  Her parents took us to a nice restaurant with a dessert tray full of gorgeous cheesecakes that seemed very normal to them.  I remember being in awe but tried to hide my excitement so they wouldn’t know that this was not the norm for my family.

I know that our wealth is not measured by anything on this earth and I know it sounds a little silly, but cheesecake reminds me that good things in small quantities are better for both my physical and fiscal health. I can have a piece of cheesecake every now and then, it doesn’t make me fancy or wealthy by any means-it just reminds me that hard work affords small rewards.  I pray God continues to bless my family with good physical and fiscal health. I also pray for strength when I crave things that could damage either one of those. 

Tomorrow I finish up my Top 3 Cravings with Chinese Food and An Organized Lifestyle

Craving Connection Part 1

This week my Peak313 Challenge is about cravings.  The Soul Food is 1 John 2:16, which speaks to cravings and how they are sinful and of the world. Clare, who facilitates the Peak313 Challenge, challenged us to list our top three cravings, when we tend to have them and to pray and take control of them.  It was also mentioned that cravings are not always food cravings.  As I was  contemplating my list, I figured out my food cravings coincide with my non-food cravings. Can any else see the little light bulb above my head?

Today is Part 1 of 3 and the subject is: Cheese Fries and Family Time.  Oh, cheese fries, how I crave you-almost as much as I crave time with my family!  

Food Craving #1-Cheese Fries. Specifically Eskimo Joe's cheese fries with bacon.  There is a reason their logo has huge smiles. 

Non-Food Craving #1-Family Time.  Some may not call it a craving, but I do and sometimes it is to a fault.  I find myself hurt when I think they don't want to spend time with me, when it's usually because time/schedules do not allow it. I also sadly know that it has been a downfall in my co-parenting with my wasband (ex husband). Too many times  I was selfish and did not want to share the kids with him and there have been several times that I have lashed out at him because he doesn't seem to crave time with the kids like I do. I have found myself attempting to make my teen aged daughter, Lo, feel guilty if she would rather hang with friends than with me and her brother, Bubby. 

B's schedule and my schedule do not always sink up.  We dated four years before getting engaged and a lot of that time he was on business trips or I was traveling with my job or just busy with the kids.  Both B and I also have our own obligations, lives, friends, etc that we are used to since we have both been single for so long. I always see our time together as important and not always as much as I would want it to be. I tend to get mad or moody when we don't have our time together and I admit, unfairly take it out on him.

What does this have to do with Eskimo Joe's cheese fries?  Well, Eskimo Joes's is two hours from my home and in Stillwater where much of my family resides. The kids and I have enjoyed many memories there with family, each trip is always an event and something I cherish dearly. B and I have also made the trip.  To me cheese fries not only equal a cheesy yummy plate full of fun, but also fond memories of my family and the time I hold so dear. I find myself longing for cheese fries when I haven't seen or spent enough time with my family.  

I pray that God helps me resist too many cheese fries and helps me understand the balance between family time and life's other responsibilities. I pray He guides my ways and tongue when I feel hurt at the lack of family time. 

Tomorrow:  Cheesecake and Financial Stability.

Have a great day!  

33% and Under 10

Week 2 of my Peak313 Challenge and Week 3 of the challenge B and I have are over. I have worked my jiggly bits off, counted and stayed within my calorie range EVERY day and revamped the way I live.  Even though I have the day off since my kids are out of school and tried desperately to sleep in, I was way too excited to weigh in this week.  After last week's 'stayed the same' weigh in, I went to the scale with anticipation.......I LOST 3 POUNDS!!!!!!!

Three pounds may not seem a lot to some people, but let me put it into perspective.  It was Week 3 of the challenge B and I levied on ourselves to get back to our goal weights. The first week of that challenge I lost 1 pound, thus making my total weight loss so far 4 pounds in 3 weeks. Since I have, I mean HAD 12 pounds to lose that means I am 33% of my goal.  That also means I have under 10 pounds to lose, which to me just feels more attainable in my stressful crazy busy life. 

As I said last week, I am not defined by the number on the scale, although it is a nice quantifiable measure.  My success this week can be measured in so many other ways, much more important ways.  The Soul Food Verse from my Peak 313 Challenge last week was Matthew 6:34 which reminds me to give my worries to God, to not worry so much about tomorrow and take it one day at a time.  Too much worry caused stress and overwhelming feelings which often led to slacking on my workouts and eating poorly in the past. I truly meditated on that verse this week and felt a lot of worry lifted. To me that is a great measurement of the changes in my life spurred by these challenges! 

Although I was not spending a lot of time worrying, I did do a lot of planning this week.  I planned to exercise, even on the busiest of days when only 30 minutes were possible.  I ended up exercising every day.  I can remember on Friday I was exhausted from a stressful week of work and was ready to go home and crash.  I made myself drive  to the park after work and family obligations for a run. I was out running errands anyway and I knew if I went back home I would crash.  I had planned to workout that day and it was going to happen one way or another.  I also planned my meals and snacks this week.  By packing my lunch and snacks I steered clear of the vending machines and crapeteria at work.  That was a big feat for me because the higher the stress in the office (ultimately high last week) the more likely I am to eat something high in calories.  I also wrote my Daily 10 List and planned specific time with God each day, invaluable planning efforts that just made the week seem achievable even in my lowest moments. 

For the Peak313 Challenge this week we are challenged to overcome our cravings, 1 John 2:16.   Cravings often come from something else lacking in our lives.  Hmmmm, it's about to get deep on my challenge.  That's okay, I'm ready for it, 33% more ready.  :-)

Have a great day friends and fellow Challengers-keep rocking it out.   

My Daily 10

I am a big fan of Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project and cannot wait to read her new book Happier at Home. I first picked up The Happiness Project at the airport on a business trip. I thought this book will not teach me anything because I have always believed my happiness is up to my relationships with God, myself and others. I still consider this true, but The Happiness Project book, website and blog all offer little reminders of how we can just make life easier and thus happier.

One of the musings that I ran across again today on Rubin's website is If I Can’t Accomplish Anything Else Today, I Can Do These 10 Things. I recalled when I first came across her list and realized I was going to start one of my own, which I never did.  I think since it's Friday and it's nice outside, I might as well make it a banner day and start My Daily 10 List.  Rubin had a few on her list that made mine. It was fun to see what I really think is a priority each day, what will give me some more happiness. 


If I Can't Accomplish Anything Else Today, I Can (WILL) Do These 10 Things: 

• Thank God for another day-I have started doing this recently before I even get out of bed.  It allows me some quiet time for prayer and thankfulness.

• Make my bed-I love, love, love how much more relaxed I am when I come home from work to a made bed.  My room seems much more inviting.

• Tell my family I love them-Try to do this every day even with my son Bubby at his dad's part of the week,thank God we still get our daily calls.

• Wear my seat belt-Typically my habit, but once in awhile I forget. Reminds me that I am not only being safe for myself, but for my kids as well-they need their mama.

• Tell my coworkers good morning-Yes, even the ones I am not incredibly fond of.

• Tidy the house before going to bed-It just makes the morning smoother and nothing piles up and becomes overwhelming.

• Give my dogs love pats and pets-They are my furkids and need love too! 

• Exercise at least 30 minutes-It just improves my mood, not to mention my body.  Win/Win.

• Read one chapter-I am an avid reader, it helps me unwind and keeps my mind from going on murmur. 

• Place tomorrow's essentials (to do list, lunch box, phone, keys, etc.)    where I can grab them-Nothing like a little grab and go when you are in a hurry.

Putting this up on the fridge, little reminders and pick me ups are always a good thing.  TGIF.  

One Day At A Time-

My Week 2 Soul Food for the Peak313 Challenge is Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34 (NIV) Really?  I'm not suppose to worry about tomorrow-the kids, home, work, finances, health.....?  The truth is we all worry about something, but the verse reminds us to give our worries to God. Our future is already written, God has a master plan and He is in control.  Wait.....I like to be in control!!!!! 

Yes at times I am a control freak,although I hate to admit it. I can't stand delegating tasks at work. I am at times an over-bearing mom, my daughter Lo can attest to that.  Before she can even respond to a text from me asking about her plans or what we need to do for college visits, I am firing more questions or go-dos.  I can remember working myself in to several frenzies planning holiday get-togethers or birthday parties. When I am slacking on my exercise or eating poorly, I really beat myself up because I consider myself out of control.  I had to learn to let go of some of that-I'm not perfect, no one is perfect.  What I need to remind myself is that I am really not in control of anything, it's up to God.  

I need to ask God daily for help getting through each day, to remind me I am not in control.  We never know when there will never be another tomorrow, today is all we have until we see the sun rise again. Being overwhelmed with all of life's worry should not consume my days. 

One of my favorite gospel songs as a child:

One day at a time, sweet Jesus
That's all I'm asking from you
Give me the strength to do everything that I have to do
Yesterday's gone sweet Jesus
And tomorrow may never be mine
Help me today
Show me the way
One day at a time.

As I once heard in a sermon-would I be ready to go see my heavenly father if it were my last day?  Seems to me that's the only thing  worth worrying about. 

Not Just at Thanksgiving

It's about that time of year, the time when everyone starts being thankful. Little kids start saying thank you more, in anticipation of Christmas gifts. Facebookers start posting 'What I am Thankful for Today' statuses.  Twitter blows up with thankful tweets. Being thankful is not just for the holiday season, the Bible reminds us to be thankful every day.  Yes, this even means those days when we feel like we have nothing to be thankful for.  Sometimes, I admit,this is a hard one for me.

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NIV) So why do we find it so hard to be thankful?  I know I get so caught up in what isn't happening or what is going wrong that I forget how blessed I am.  It's nice to be reminded at the holidays to give thanks, but I must make it part of my daily routine.  God has given me two beautiful children, blessed me with my soul mate, a well paid occupation, guided me through some of the worst situations, the list is endless. 

Being thankful for everything I have everyday sometimes gets sidelined looking over the fence and trying to measure my happiness. I need to remind myself that I am truly blessed beyond measure and those blessings are not measured by how big my house is or how new my car is. They are not measured by how skinny I am or what my clothes look like.  It makes me sad that our society sends a very different image to my children.  I watch families fall apart trying to keep up with the Jones's.  I see people everyday put their morals and Christianity on the back burner in favor of greed, rising to the top of their occupation or social class.

I am not saying that working hard shouldn't allow us a comfortable lifestyle, but what makes us comfortable? Is comfortable forgetting all my blessings and constantly trying to outdo others? Or is comfortable giving thanks everyday for everything (good or bad) in my life, regardless of the situation because I know God has wonderful plans for me?  I choose the latter.  

Be thankful today and not just at Thanksgiving, friends.  God has your back even when you feel like there is nothing to be thankful for, trust me.  

I Came, I Challenged, I Stayed the Same...or Did I?

I woke up this morning with great anticipation of stepping on the scale, I had completed both week 2 of my challenge with B to get back to our goal weights as well as week 1 of the fitness challenge at Peak313.  I held my breath....come on I worked so hard....the number glowed before me and it was-THE SAME as it was last week!  WHAT???? How could this be? I counted my calories every day and worked my tail off exercising 6 days this week (even though I had planned on 7).  How did I stay the same? I feel different but my weight has not changed.  

The truth is I haven't stayed the same.  I am defined by so much more than the number on the scale.  This week I spent more time with my God, asking for strength and giving all my worries (not just weight issues) to him.  I have truly felt his presence this week and was blessed time and time again by his goodness. I feel my relationship with my heavenly father growing and changing daily.  It is not the same as it was last week or yesterday. 

I easily recalled how good I felt after hard workouts once I got back in to the routine this week.  Do I have sore muscles?  Yes.  Blisters from my new running shoes?  Oh yeah.  But it's the kind of hurt that reminds me everything worth having requires work.  Nothing happens without discipline.  My work ethic is changing too and I feel the drive I did when I had over 40 pounds to lose, not 12.  Hebrews 12:11 has been a good verse for me to meditate on this week along with the Peak 313 verse that I memorized.  

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Hebrews 12:11 (NIV)

I was more disciplined with my eating habits this week and stopped to pray if I felt I was eating out of emotion.  I feel the changing inside me to move away from eating out of sadness, happiness, anxiety, the list goes on and on.  My calorie count went well this week and I didn't even lie to MyFitnessPal app!  That sort of makes me giggle now but I am still ashamed I once did that.  

I will not be discouraged by the number on the scale, I feel God changing me for the better.  My physical, emotional and spiritual fitness will all be in sync one day and I keep praying I will be able to maintain them for a lifetime.  Time to head in to another week of both my challenges and I am positive that something successful will be reported again next week!

Love to all my Peak313 Challenge friends-KEEP IT UP!!!

Calleen 

Shed and Shedding...

This morning I was reading  The Shed and Share stories on Peak313 Fitness  and was inspired to share my own Shed (and Shedding) story.  I have never ever posted publicly the picture that made me say "ENOUGH" and start my shedding journey.  But, you can't truly move forward without embracing your past, right? Plus we are all in this together, we need each other and we need our God.  Let's not forget Ecclesiastes 4:12, the threefold chord is not easily broken.  Here I go (deep breath!).......

After I had developed the Christmas pictures in January 2005, I had to stop a minute and wonder who was that girl in the sweatshirt?  The answer: me. I didn't recognize myself at all.  I had never had a problem with weight, I had always been petite and lost the weight from both babies very quickly.  But this weight was something different, it was the product of a marriage that was not Christ-centered, depression, years of emotional abuse and stress beyond anything I had ever experienced.  My 'wasband' (the man I was married to previously) and I had been married for 5 years and at the young age of 26 I was balancing two children ages 9 and 4, a full time job and finishing up my bachelor's program. Believe it or not, my wasband actually preferred me in this state as he had always been insecure that I would leave him for someone else.  But, this isn't about him...so back to my story.  Below is the picture that put a stop to my weight gain and encouraged me to enter Weight Watchers in January 2005,  I was successful and lost about 40 pounds by the following summer.

Christmas 2004

I was successful at weight loss, but was unsuccessful in marriage and we sadly divorced in July 2007. It was rough being a single mother again, I had been one as a teenager.   Eventually stress started to take its toll after I bought a house and was juggling kids, new house, work, finishing up my thesis for my grad degree, and on and on.  I was also in a new relationship with B (who is now my fiance) and trying to just figure out where everyone and everything fit in was a huge task.  I ended up gaining 30  pounds back, as you can see from the picture below.  It was the beginning of football season, 2010 and I was not feeling great (despite my best thumbs up effort) about being in a crowded football stadium around a bunch of skinny moms watching my daughter cheer.  

August 2010

Again, another picture spoke a thousand words and slapped me back in to reality.  Not long after this picture, I turned 32 on November 5th and decided it was time for me to lose 32 pounds.  I joined a gym for the first time in a decade, revamped my exercise and eating habits and with B by my side, I was successful by June 2011. Candace Cameron Bure's  Reshaping It All was my guidebook and taught me that my spiritual, physical and emotional well-being is the three legged stool I must balance on.  I thought it was kind of cool that it took me just over 32 weeks to lose the 32 pounds.  By the next football season, I had lost a bonus 5 pounds and I was ready with TWO thumbs up! 

August 2011

Since August 2011, I have gained back about 12 pounds. Kind of funny, another 12 pounds in 12 months.  I enjoyed LOSING the 32 in 32 weeks way better!!!  I can't blame anything else this time but my own slacking ways.  I know I have been eating a little more, exercising a little less.  Thanks to B challenging me two weeks ago to get back to our goal weights along with the challenge I started at Peak313 Fitness  on Monday, I am ready for life long success.  My weight loss remedy is pretty simple: Spiritual, Physical and Emotional  fitness are the keys to making the thumbs go up!  

Have a Blessed Day!

Calleen   

Tough Friendship

I have heard of tough love, seems to be a buzz term that pops up on anything from a documentary of addicts to blogs on how to potty train a toddler. Tough friendship seems to be something that weighs on my mind a lot lately.  What do I mean by tough friendship?  Sure it's tough to be friends with someone who is going through a hard time or doesn't always treat you the way you treat them.  We have all been there.  What I am talking about when I refer to tough friendship is REAL friendship, the kind that isn't about keeping each other happy with compliments, remaining surface with one another and cutting ties if things get too rough or too deep.  

I recently came across a discussion on Galatians 4:12-20, where Paul speaks to the Galatians. In verse 15 Paul has a good message.  He is basically saying to a friend that they are a child of God, that they had a joyful life as His child.  He is also asking if they have forgotten who they are. When I witness a friend straying from the path God has intended for them, do I sit back or do I give a little tough friendship?

Facebook is a funny little peek in to people's lives.  Often people pride themselves on how many 'friends' they have.  But how many are truly their friends?  Case in point:  I was once 'friends' on Facebook with a woman who was having marital problems, her husband and her were no longer communicating.  The evolution of their problems was apparent in her online photo albums, gone were pictures of a fresh faced smiling wife with her husband and kids.  In their place was hundreds (literally) of snapshots of a woman I barely recognized in tight fitting revealing clothing out on the town with her 'friends.'  But were these women she was posing with really her friends?  I wonder if any of them ever asked her about her marriage or made a suggestion of how she could have saved it. What if one of her 'friends' would have offered to babysit so she could have a date  with her husband? I am sad to admit I really didn't know this woman well enough to say anything myself and I wish I would have been more of a Christian friend to her and was able to give some tough friendship. 

Tough friendship is difficult for me, I admit.  I often sound judgemental.  I have a lot of friends who express a desire to want to be more physically fit but when I invite them to fitness challenges or talk about eating healthy, I see some tune me out. I think they believe I am judging. But I believe being a true friend isn't always drowning our sorrows in cheese dip or trading 'feel sorry for me' stories, it is about helping one another be the best we can be as Christians spiritually, emotionally and physically.  Ephesians 4:15 reminds me to speak the truth in Love. I know I need to be more understanding of my friends feelings while still speaking to them in a truthful manner.  I pray God will guide my ways and tongue.  We can still have those cheese dip moments and request some pity of one another, but we must also sharpen one another.  

Challenge Accepted

Finding myself strayed 12 pounds away from my weight loss goal I reached last summer, this challenge could not have come at a better time!  B and I have also challenged one another to get back to our goal weights by November 1st so I figure this challenge can only add to my success. 

The Bible verse for this week is: Ecclesiastes 4:12 And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him-a threefold cord is not quickly broken.  One of my favorites as during my years as a single mom I often thought of my two children and I as a threefold cord. 

The challenge this week is: find someone else to join this challenge.  I am a little discouraged by this challenge because I recently sent out some emails to several ladies that I have expressed a need to want to lead a healthier lifestyle.  No takers, but I am praying that God will lead me to someone that will not only join this challenge, but benefit from it as well.  We can't do this alone, friends!  Anyone who wants to join (you don't have to be a blogger) can and I promise to support you.

My personal goals for this week are:

• Exercise at least 30 minutes a day, prefereably more, 7 days this week: I used to do this easily when I first started my weight loss journey, now it is more difficult. I loved getting up way early and starting my day with workouts at the gym, but lately those are more difficult and I hate working out after work. Today this is already a challenge since I am accustom to my early morning workouts at the gym and this weekend I misplaced my access card.  Hoping to get it back after work to get back on track. In the meantime I will just add a little variety with some outdoor cardio and stability ball exercises. I look forward to a wide range of exercising since I tend to get ADD on the treadmill.

• Be accountable for what I eat: I have myfitness pal app that allows me to count the calories, but I actually find myself ignoring it lately or even (sadly) LYING to it.  I know, I know-it only works if I put in the right information and own up to what I am eating.  This week I resolve to be accountable every day, even if it is ugly. 

• Stay focused and remember it is more than weight loss: A few years ago I finally figured out that my spiritual and physical well being are closely tied.  I must remember when I falter or struggle, that prayer will get me through. 

So excited  for this week and challenge!  I pray that many more will join and benefit.