Non-Traditional Bullying

We all hear a lot about double standards, but one has come to light a lot in my life recently that I feel is worth  mentioning.  I understand I may receive some criticism or people will not be fond of this post, but this is my blog that contains my thoughts, opinions, values and so on.

The double standard I am talking about is a form of bullying. Attacking one's physical appearance.  No I am not talking about making fun of someones hair or unattractive nose.  I am speaking about those who attack others about their weight and physical health.  You can't pick up a news article or peruse Facebook without seeing a story about how a bully called another person fat or lazy.  But how often do we hear about people being bullied for being in good physical health and therefore slender, athletic or muscular in stature?

I can all ready hear those who disagree with me....what is she saying?  No one makes fun of skinny people, everyone picks on people who are overweight.   It is my stance that bullying that is not traditionally recognized in the media is just as prevalent as the more publicized bullying is.  Let me just give you an example of a few things that I have heard aimed toward me in the last few months:

• Don't you ever eat?  The truth is I love to eat, to plan meals and enjoy treats.  I also watch my calories as to not overdue it (I have been overweight before).  I am also not underweight.  I do not have an eating disorder and I do not starve myself.  Doesn't sound like bullying to you?  Then tell me this-is it any different than someone saying to an overweight person you must eat a lot?  

• You spend so much time in the gym that you probably never see your family. Actually, I typically try to work out while my family is still sleeping or otherwise engaged.  It is not the business of anyone how I run my life, but when you assume I don't spend time with my family it really stings because family time is my most cherished possession.  Sounds like more mean statements to me.

• Your fiance must really push you to be skinny and that's too bad, he should love you the way you are.  I hear this so much and I realize it's because I post on Facebook frequently about how B and I get our cardio time in together. We also challenged one another to get back to our goal weights, which I have also been public about.  Since I make it public, these crude comments should not really bother me but they do a little.  B loves me the way I am, but he also understands the value of good health and that I am not happy when I have let my weight get out of control.  The way he cooks healthy meals and suggests a walk over dessert actually shows me how much he does love me.  

 Bullying takes on several forms and it can be aimed at anyone. It hurts just as bad even if it is not what is considered to be 'traditional' bullying.  I just wish more people would recognize that.  

Happy Saturday!